It's no secret that I created the Good Grief Journal nor that Good Grief has changed my life. But I haven't ever really expounded on HOW Good Grief changed my life.
If you're new here or just don't remember, Good Grief came to be because I had SEARCHED for something to help me cope for over a year and after being unsuccessful in finding anything I made the decision to create what I needed.
During the creation process I asked over 100 women about their infertility experiences. I asked them about what they wished they had and what helped them most. Their answers were incredible and helped me SO much in my own journey. They buoyed me up and helped me to continue forward in the creation process and I couldn't have done it without them.
Good Grief quickly became something I HAD to have in my life. I had previously used the notes app on my phone to record my journey but I wanted something more substantial and something that wouldn't get lost or deleted (more on that in a minute)
Once the Good Grief Journal was created and I had a physical copy in my hands I began using it almost instantly. There was a huge shift in my feelings and I realized something that I hadn't noticed before. With Good Grief I could write out the negative feelings and leave them in the journal. I wasn't physically carrying them around anymore. They lived in my journal and didn't have to be with me all the time. I was able to write them down and let go of them.
Another thing that has been a game changer for me is that Good Grief forced me to think about the hard questions I had been avoiding and find answers to them. Parker and I made decisions together for the future that made sense to us and our situation. Having these decisions made allowed conversations with friends to be 100x easier because I already had the answers to their questions. I knew why we chose the treatment path we did, I knew what our limits were and I knew when we would move on.
Good Grief also provided me with opportunities to set goals that don't pertain to motherhood or having babies. It helped me get outside of our infertility journey and focus on the rest of life that was happening around me. This helped me to propel my business forward, do things that scared me (go to workshops and conferences alone) and actually LIVE my life. Instead of just living in a daydream.
Along with helping me with the hard questions, Good Grief addressed my fears and concerns. It helped me face the things that scared me about IVF. It helped me recognize my fears and concerns with foster care and adoption (I'm not against those at all, I'm just not ready for those things yet.) It helped me work through my trial of faith.
Good Grief has been so beneficial for me because it feels like a friend sincerely asking questions and nobody will judge me for the answers I put. Over time the answers to each of the questions may change, but that's how life works. We change and grow and learn new skills along the way. Our opinions and path may change and that's okay. I am grateful for Good Grief because it gave me the starting point I needed to get out of a dark place. It allows me to help other women in my similar situation and it truly has helped me to become a better person.
Good Grief was created with you in mind. It was created for me and it was created for you. I promise it can help you in your journey. If you don't want to share about your experience with infertility but you are struggling to cope, Good Grief is for you. Keep going. You've got this friend.